CAIRNS, A CITY AT WAR WITH ITSELF, PART 5

"Political correctness is for fools!" The Cairns radio shock-jock couldn't resist bringing up one of his favorite subjects before His Worship, the Mayor of Cairns, Colonel (Retired) Ken Cush, arrived in his studio as guest speaker on his talk-back radio program.

For years the shock-jock had ranted and railed against the curtailment of free speech, arguing that freedom of speech was one of the greatest freedoms bestowed upon the common person. He had his supporters too and the shock jock was delighted to find one on the line waiting to talk to him.

"Hello, we have Tremayne of Forest Gardens on the line," jovially announced the shock-jock.

"Oh, I agree mate with what you said about political correctness," rushed in "Tremayne".
"I mean, all those bloody academics and milksops reckon it's some sort of brake society needs in order to maintain decency and civility....."

"Which is utter crap," broke in the shock jock. "I mean, what would they know?"

"Oh exactly, exactly," agreed "Tremayne" in a deferential tone, buttering up the shock jock and lulling him into a sense of false security.

A sharp rat a tat on the glass door leading into the on-air studio, momentarily distracted the shock jock and he looked up to see Colonel Cush grinning back at him. Abandoning his head set for a moment, he stood up, greeted Cush with a hearty handshake and motioned Cush to the seat opposite his desk. "Tremayne" was continuing, but the shock jock wasn't worried. After all, the caller agreed with him.

"I absolutely agree with you, no problems. I mean why should I be prevented from telling you publicly or privately that I think you are a simple minded, half witted, fucked in the head, alcoholic, closet dick licking, dog fucking, goat molesting imbecile......"
"Tremayne" alias "Wayne" alias "Shane" alias "Zane" couldn't believe his luck. All other times he had attepted to exercise his rights to free speech, free from the constraints of "political correctness" on the radio shock jocks program, he had been cut off. For all his raving and mouthing, the radio shock jock couldn't take anyone being honest with their opinion.

"You're a bloody liar and you're a shithouse bred hypocrite........" "Tremayne was saying, as the radio shock jock realised suddenly that all of this was going on-air. He found himself colouring up and trembling as he cut Tremayne off. "Oh, oh we seem to have lost Tremayne," he announced in a strangled voice. "We will go to music and when we come back, we will be talking with His Worship, the esteemed and great Mayor of Cairns, Colonel Ken Cush."

Colonel Cush had heard some of what "Tremayne" had said and he laughed. The shock jock looked sharply, accusingly at him, and Cush attempted to disguise it in a coughing fit. He noticed the shock jock had turned a beetroot red.

"There's some turds of people out there," said Cush when the coughing had died down.

"Oh, I know, I know," gushed the shock jock in aggrieved tones. "They think they can say whatever they like. Some of them are just so crude! You wonder what the world is coming to, you really do."

"Yes indeed," agreed Cush. "Cheeky buggars, all need sending into the army, over to Afghanistan for a couple of years, that'd straighten em all out."

......................................................

The music break ending, the shock jock commenced the interview with Cush regarding the recent controversy in Cairns over the sale of Mt Whitfield to the Chinese Shang Hai Hangyang Corporation.

"So Mayor Cush," asked the shock jock, "I hope you read the Editorial in yesterdays "Cairns Post" begging the Councillors who voted against the sale, to go back to Council and rescind their vote?"

"Yes," said Cush, "and I congratulate the Editor of The Cairns Post for writing such a fine editorial, taking into consideration the needs of the city and the region...."

"He's a clever fellow," broke in the shock jock. "He's a good mate of mine and he has always impressed me as being passionate, just passionate about the needs of this city."

"Undoubtedly," agreed Cush passively. "The Cairns Post has always stood beside me as I have steered this city in the right direction...."

"You've changed the entire city ambience, since you were elected," gushed the shock jock, "I mean the streets of the central business district are just full of people and the night life is now just to die for. Just to die for, so many adult clubs and entertainment...."

"I gave the people of Cairns, just what they wanted," returned Cush. "The previous Council led by Mayor Schier wanted some unholy monstrosity of a performing arts theatre built on good land, which we have sold off to a Chinese corporation as you know for a good profit. "

"The building is magnificent, a real asset to Cairns with the Chinese national flag painted on the side overlooking the city," broke in the shock jock. "I mean so many tourists comment that it makes the skyline of Cairns so much more colourful."

Cush almost choked at this banality by the shock jock, however he merely nodded instead. Frankly, he was pissed off by the sight of the Chinese Communist flag overlooking the entire city, but few people apart from some old RSL boys had bothered to complain.

"Yes," said Cush. "People are very supportive of my decisions and they all tell me Cairns just is not the sort of city to have a fancy schmancy modern theatre so all the chardy drinking toffs can dress up in tuxes to go see the ballet."

"Exactly," said the shock jock, "I have been telling the people of Cairns that for years!"

"So I give them the type of entertainment the people really wanted, places like The Red Plum. Well, they tell me that there's standing room there only most nights, especially when Erris and her Snake are performing. Have you seen her show by the way?"

The shock jock had, of course. However he didn't think the details should go out on air. Not really. The Catholic Church, the womens groups, the feminist lobby, all had been up in arms and screaming their heads off when it was revealed that Erris, an "exotic" dancer from Thailand, performed certain erotic acts with her pet snake.

"Eeeer, yes, Mr Mayor, and I agree with you. Cairns people, so many of them, phoned me daily saying they didn't want a new theatre, and I agree, adult entertainment like The Red Plum is much more suitable for Cairns people and for the tourists, and let's face it, tourists want adult entertainment, not to see something ridiculous and stupid like Phantom of the Opera or Swan Lake. But let's move forward shall we, to this latest controversy over the sale of Mt Whitfield to the Chinese, Shanghai Hangyang Corporation. I mean, I can't understand why some Councillors voted against this? It is the best thing to happen to Cairns in a long long while. I mean, we have had no major project since the additions were built to the Cairsn Base Hospital. Governments all forget about us, and give everything to Townsville or the South East corner. Surely the Councillors must know this? Surely they know that this project, which is an Executive Training and Retreat complex, with over 3,000 rooms and almost an entire resort town, will be a major source of employment for the people of Cairns?"

The moment had come for Cush. He hoped it would come off, as he planned. Now was the time to be "cagey" and crafty.

"Well," he began, trying to sound laid back, "I guess those Councillors feel for the environment, and believe in the aesthetic value of the undeveloped hillslopes around Cairns , and don't see them in terms of economic value."

"Greenies!" spat back the shock jock. "I have been saying for years that these people are holding Cairns back, holding back our progress and development. I mean where do they get off?"

Cush could hardly believe his luck.

"Ahhhh," he began cautiously, "They have considerable ummm clout, if you like, even as far as our nation's Federal Parliament."

"Canberra?" the shock jock latched on like a pit bull on a bare leg. "What's Canberra got to do with this? This development is OUR decision, not Canberra's surely?"

Careful, careful, thought Cush. Just give him so much, he'll do the rest.

"Our Greens are represented in Canberra," Cush replied, "and they do have influence in many ways, and I'm afraid I can't go any further than that."

"You can't or you won't?" broke in the shock jock.

Cush could see the shock jocks mind racing away, making Olympic leaps into wrong conclusions, and he laughed inwardly. It was going better than he thought.

Cush took is time answering, making it seem that he was struggling. "Look, I really don't want to go into this in any more detail except to say that I won't be asking the Councillors to rescind the vote on the sale of Mt Whitfield. I feel I may have said more than I should as it is."

The shock jock was now all fired up, his mind, Cush knew, had already somersaulted to incorrect conclusions.

"Mr Mayor," said the shock jock in outraged tones, "Are you saying that the Greenies in the Council, the likes of Skye Lovelady and company, have called in Canberra on this issue? Is this what you are saying?"

Cush pretended to be embarrassed and a little distraught. Hastily, he pulled out his handkerchief from his pocket and wiped his face. "No, no, no," he muttered in an anguished soft voice. "Look, umm, I really can't talk about this any more except to say that the sale of Mt Whitfield won't be going ahead. And if you excuse me, that's all I am saying on the matter. I really must get back to Council."

Cush stood up, still wiping his face.

The look on the shock jock's face said it all. Cush could see exactly what he was thinking, and it was all he could do not to guaffaw out loud. Drop the tiniest little hint..........

Hastily, he shook the shock jock's hand, and left as quickly as he could.

Downstairs from the building, he switched on his car radio to listen to the rest of the program. The shock jock did exactly what Cush knew he would do.

"I hope everyone heard that interview with His Worship, the Mayor of Cairns, Colonel Ken Cush," the shock jock was saying. "It seems, if we can use our brains, and work out what he wasn't saying, or wasn't prepared to say, that our Greens Councillors, namely one Councillor Skye Lovelady, has been whinging and whining to Canberra about the sale of Mt Whitfield. I mean, the Mayor himself, is just too much a gentleman, too gallant to betray a lady, even if it is one of his own deceitful Councillors who has undermined him from the day they were elected."

The shock jock was in true form now and his voice rose higher with indignation. "Councillor Lovelady has obviously called in the Federal Government to stick their noses into a local government matter, and they have obviously threatened or intimidated our Mayor. Our wonderful Mayor, who has done great things, great things for this city."

"You wonder again, as I have said before many times on this program, at the sheer influence of this Councillor. I mean, how does she have such good friends in Canberra, to do her bidding whenever she snaps her fingers. How does she do it? How does she do it?."

"I have some callers online now, to discuss this latest development. Hello Reg of Redlynch."

"Ohhhh mate, maaaate," said Reg, who was a regular caller on the shock jocks radio program.
"I listened to Colonel Cush and I heard him well and good. He was too much of a gentleman to betray his Councillor even though she has obviously done the dirty on him."

"Exactly!" agreed the shock jock. "He's a thoroughly nice bloke, our Mayor. You know, people just don't know how nice he really is and when you see something like this, this treachery from a Councillor, and yet here he is, our Mayor, still unprepared to name her and shame her, still trying to protect her name..."

"Oooh I know, I know," said Reg. "So I reckon the people of Cairns should all get behind Colonel Cush and go down there to the Council offices tomorrow and let those Councillors like Lovelady know they want this project to go ahead. That'll teach Canberra to keep their bloody noses out!"

"I've been calling for a big counter demonstration for a few days now," agreed the shock jock. "And the time has come, Reg. I want all those tradies, concretors, painters, plumbers, wholesalers and so on, out there at the front of the Council offices tomorrow morning. A big demonstration to let the Councillors know, we want this Shanghai Hangyang development in our city."

The next caller was "Jimbo" from Mooroobool.

"Yeah mate," said Jimbo. "I'll be down there tomorrow morning, around 10ish I reckon, and I'll give that witch a bit of what for."

"Good on yer mate, that's the spirit!" said the shock jock. "Spread the word too mate!"

.........................

Driving back to the Cairns Regional Council offices, Cush laughed and laughed so hard, he almost had an accident in Spence Street. Tomorrow, he thought, was going to be a fun day!

To be continued...............

CAIRNS, A CITY AT WAR WITH ITSELF, PART 4

HIS WORSHIP THE MAYOR OF CAIRNS REGIONAL COUNCIL, Colonel (Retired) Ken Cush was in his Mayor's Office leaning back in his chair and discussing with his Deputy, Councillor Horseman, how to best get rid of Councillor Piper. It was a subject enthusiastically pursued by both Cush and "Horsey", however despite the number of conversations they had on the subject, they could not come up with a fool-proof, perfect murder.

"You reckon we could get someone to tinker with his car, just before we send him up to Port Douglas for the day?" Cush speculated. "Take a chance he just goes over the side on one of those bends."

"A bit dicey hey, I reckon." replied Horsey, leaning back in his chair and putting his legs up on Cush's desk.

Cush spotted a blinking light on his desk phone, indicating an incoming call. Hastily, he sat up.
"We'll think of something." He motioned with his hand to Horsey that the conversation was over, and leaned forward to take the call. Horsey stood up and left the Mayor's Office, thinking he might play the Red Plum Nightclub a visit and put out some feelers for a possible hitman.

"This is Susan Clourdy, the Secretary for National Security, Attorney-General's Office, in Canberra," announced a crisp, confident female voice, when Cush answered. "Am I speaking to His Worship the Mayor of Cairns Regional Council, Colonel Ken Cush?"

"I just told you, lady!" replied Cush, instantly hating the confidence and efficiency of the female voice and thinking he would give this Susan Clourdy something to remember. Bloody females, taking over the whole bloody world, he fumed inwardly.

"We have secured this call, Colonel Cush," continued Susan Clourdy. "So that no-one can listen to what we are discussing, other than you and I. Is that clear?"

What the fuck! thought Cush. "Why does it need to be secure?" he grunted aggressively.

"Colonel Cush, we are about to discuss an issue of National Security. I am sure you can understand the need for caution on such a delicate issue?" replied Ms Clourdy.

"No I don't know what the hell you are talking about, you better bloody explain yourself." Cush was getting really pissed off.

It was Ms Clourdy's turn to sound irritated. "I am going to, Colonel Cush. I am going to."
"It is about the issue of the Shanghai Hangyang Corporation and the plans by your Council to sell a large tract of land to them......"

"So what's it got to do with you lot?" Cush cut in. "I'm Mayor of this city and I have the right to sell off Council land. Why the hell are you lot in Canberra sticking your noses in where you're not welcome?"

There was a brief silence before Ms. Clourdy continued, "We believe the Shanghai Hangyang Corporation is not a legitimate corporation but in fact a front for Chinese intelligence agencies. We believe if your Council approves the sale of land to this corporation, you will be exposing Australia to serious and grave concerns regarding our national security."

Cush was genuinely astounded. "Well fuck me dead!" he growled. There was a shocked silence on the other end of the phone.

"Colonel Cush, do you understand the gravity of what I am saying?" continued Ms Clourdy who was now sounding exasperated and who was starting to understand why the Prime Minister's Secretary had mentioned something about Colonel Cush being a bit of a "Northern rednecked fuckwit."

His mind still reeling with this totally unexpected information, Cush rallied. "Yeah, yeah." he replied. "But are you sure you blokes down there got it right?"

Ms. Clourdy's reply was cold and abrupt. "Our intelligence sources are beyond doubt on this one, Colonel."

"We demand that you and your Council no longer engage in any discussion or business activity with the Shanghai Hangyang Corporation. We understand that your own Councillors have voted recently to not proceed with the sale of the council owned land. We ask that you let that decision stand." continued Ms. Clourdy.

"And if I don't? What are youse gunna do, hey?" snarled back Cush hating this so efficient and so superior Ms. Clourdy even more.

"Colonel Cush, this matter is known to the Prime Minister, Malcolm Turnbull on whose direct advice I have contacted you. I will be reporting the results of my telephone conversation back to his office. Should you continue to have contact with the Shanghai Hangyang Corporation and should you attempt to rescind the original vote by Council on this matter, the Prime Minister can request State Government intervention in your Council. You must know the procedure. The State Government can sack you as Mayor and dissolve the Council and appoint an interim management committee. Now do you understand!" Ms. Clourdy's voice was raised to a high irritated pitch.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah." replied Cush, thinking furiously.

"Good day to you then Colonel Cush," replied Ms. Clourdy, ending the call.

................................................

Susan Clourdy sat back in her chair and looked across at her colleague, Dean Jansen, the Assistant Secretary. "What a horrible man!" she exclaimed. "He was so aggressive!"

Dean Jansen laughed hollowly. "Cairns is the "deep North" of Australia. They like 'em rednecked, neanderthal and misognist up there. Even had a political candidate one time who actually stated that women who drank should take some of the blame for being raped."

Susan Clourdy shrieked. "You're kidding, right!"

Dean Jansen shook his head. "Nope!"

Clourdy frowned. "I just don't trust this Colonel Cush character. I have a gut instinct about him, and I'm going to act on it. Can you see that two of our field agents are briefed and sent to Cairns. I beieve Cush needs watching and I want to be kept informed of exactly what is happening, full reports day by day. The Prime Minister will also need to be briefed."

"Done!" said Jansen.

...............................................


Cush leaned back in his chair, digesting the information delivered by the Attorney-General's Office. He was due to be "onair" in an hour's time, as a regular guest on the local radio shock jocks call back program. The shock jock had discussed with him before that the issue would be solely about the sale of Mt Whitfield to the Shanghai Hangyang Corporation, which had fired up the people of Cairns. The more Cush thought about it, the more he started smiling. He could work this latest information to his advantage and no-one would be any wiser! He chuckled to himself at the daring of it all.

To be continued...............